Working It Out Release Party—On Inspiration

July 19, 2014

I’m back!

So, those first lines. Where did they come from?

Working It Out is a novella about finding out how you know you’re in love. After six months living with his boyfriend, Joe, and around a year before that of more-or-less casually hooking up with him, Cas just isn’t sure. Joe’s sure, and that’s part of Cas’s problem.

This story began with the question Cas raises. What is love, and how do you know you’re in love? It’s something I’ve always wondered and struggled with. You see, I’ve never been in love. Or, at least, I don’t think I have. In my younger years I did have a couple of relationships. I even lived with someone for five years. But….
You see, I don’t really get love, friendship and all that jazz. It’s a complete mystery to me. I don’t think about people if they’re not in the immediate vicinity. Out of sight truly is out of mind. I don’t miss people; I don’t worry about them. Maybe that’s why I’m writing romance, the ultimate relationship story. I’m trying to understand the same thing Cas is. How you link to people, how that feels.

It’s a problem when you’re largely—well, I’m not sure if the word is antisocial or asocial. I can interact with people, on the surface at least. I work in offices and everyone says I’m nice, I’m a central part of the team. In one instance I worked in a team that was so dysfunctional they called in an independent arbitration service to try to get to the bottom of the problem and fix it. Apparently I was the one person everyone liked and the one who held the team together. While that’s nice to know, I guess, when I left that place a couple of years later I never thought about them again.

I’m not a keeping in touch sort of person, it doesn’t occur to me to share my thoughts and reactions with people. So love is an exotic and incomprehensible thing that I just don’t understand. Over the years I’ve asked myself that opening question many times and never got an answer. This time, I wrote it down and it became a story. I don’t think I’m any closer to the answer, although I’m getting pretty good at the theory. I suspect the people who say “you just know” are right. I’m not going to stop asking, though. And I’m not going to stop writing love stories.

Don’t forget, if you would like a chance to try my story out for free, comment on any of my posts here today. My question for this hour is have you ever been in love? And how did you know? (Of course, you can always ask your own questions if you’d prefer.)


Celebrating six months with his boyfriend has Cas in a bit of a panic. Joe’s been saying “I love you” for a while, but Cas just can’t get the words past his lips. A week before Christmas, he finally says them when a nearly fatal accident almost takes Joe, and Cas faces the possibility of losing the best man he’s ever known. But whispered declarations are one thing. Through a long, tough recovery both men must work out that love is more than words.

You can buy the book by going to my page in the Dreamspinner store. And you can see what else I have to say on my blog and in tweets.

Cover of Working It Out by Kristen Slater

8 Responses to “Working It Out Release Party—On Inspiration”

  1. H.B. says:

    I don’t think I’ve ever been in love and like you I’m curious about how one should feel and know. I mean loving your family and loving a significant other should be different, right?

  2. Susan says:

    I’ve thought I was in love a few times, but it all turned out to be lust. I totally agree with your attitude!

  3. Deborah H says:

    They are right you do kind of just know. For example- Because you can’t stop them from popping up in your head. Wondering what there doing, are they having fun that sort of thing. & when your around them & aren’t even doing anything together, just doing your own thing & he’s/she’s doing his/her own thing you just feel happy.

  4. Kristen says:

    This is fascinating – I’m getting some really good research done here!

    H.B., I agree, I think how you feel about a significant other should be special. Otherwise, why would everyone make such a fuss about it? I’ve just read Legally Wed by Rick Reed in which two friends decide to marry on the basis of friendship. People tell them they shouldn’t, that they should hold out for love because it’s more than just friendship.

  5. Kristen says:

    Susan, I’m not sure it was even lust for me. More following what everyone else was doing, like a good little sheep. I came to my senses and since then I haven’t taken up with someone just because, well, that’s what people do.

  6. Kristen says:

    Deborah, this matches what I hear elsewhere. Since I’ve never reacted that way to someone, it’s difficult to know what it feels like, but I have a sort of academic appreciation of the theory. I just have to learn how to write it well, now.

  7. Trix says:

    I crush pretty hard on guys, but it does tend to be kind of one-sided. And things kind of hold me back a little…

  8. Kristen says:

    One day, hopefully, one will crush right on back – and there you’ll be, all crushed together. :D

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