Happy(?) Holidays with Xara X. Xanakas

December 10, 2015

It’s that time of year. When we’re bombarded with images of happy families getting together, smiling and laughing together, with no signs of discord or strife. Ideal pictures of ideal families.

Sweet? Yes. Realistic? No. Not at all.

It makes for happy stories, but it’s not always the case. There will always be disagreements. Someone will walk all over someone else’s feelings. There will be awkward moments, disappointing behavior, and tons of stress.

Whatever your family situation, please remember: this is only temporary. Forced uncomfortable family interactions only last for the hours when you’re around them. Don’t let it linger afterwards. You have more family than your blood or marriage relatives. We talk a lot about families of choice. The ones you choose to spend time with, the ones you choose to have your back, the ones you choose to spend time with.

But don’t forget: they are the ones that also choose you as well. They know the real you, and they still choose to be there for you. They choose to accept you, no matter what. I think it’s important to remember that. It’s not a one-way street, and it’s not obligation.

THEY CHOOSE YOU TOO.

If your family situation is stressful, please take care of yourself this holiday season. Take breaks as you can. Don’t internalize the rhetoric that one uncle is spewing.

 

Here’s some suggestions for taking care of yourself:

http://greatist.com/happiness/ways-to-practice-self-care

http://greatist.com/happiness/reduce-anxiety

http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-10722/20-simple-ways-to-take-great-care-of-yourself.html

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201501/6-ways-take-better-care-yourself

http://shelbys-advice-blog.tumblr.com/post/111965409857/calming-masterpost

And some resources you can call if you need assistance:

http://paraminasblog.tumblr.com/post/114598854532/hotlines

http://sapphire-burns.tumblr.com/post/58660243079/help-holtliness

http://mentalillnessmouse.tumblr.com/post/134554943582/gay-lesbian-hotlines

http://everyday-is-purple.tumblr.com/post/55171389448

http://mentalhealthaware.tumblr.com/post/60741588557/helplines-and-hotlines-for-everyone

 

Please, take care of yourself, and remember, this is only one day (or only a few). You have at least 350 other days that are all yours. When you can be yourself. When you can surround yourself with those who choose you. Don’t let the assholes win.

~xXx~

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