Happy(?) Holidays with Xara X. Xanakas

December 10, 2015

It’s that time of year. When we’re bombarded with images of happy families getting together, smiling and laughing together, with no signs of discord or strife. Ideal pictures of ideal families.

Sweet? Yes. Realistic? No. Not at all.

It makes for happy stories, but it’s not always the case. There will always be disagreements. Someone will walk all over someone else’s feelings. There will be awkward moments, disappointing behavior, and tons of stress.

Whatever your family situation, please remember: this is only temporary. Forced uncomfortable family interactions only last for the hours when you’re around them. Don’t let it linger afterwards. You have more family than your blood or marriage relatives. We talk a lot about families of choice. The ones you choose to spend time with, the ones you choose to have your back, the ones you choose to spend time with.

But don’t forget: they are the ones that also choose you as well. They know the real you, and they still choose to be there for you. They choose to accept you, no matter what. I think it’s important to remember that. It’s not a one-way street, and it’s not obligation.


If your family situation is stressful, please take care of yourself this holiday season. Take breaks as you can. Don’t internalize the rhetoric that one uncle is spewing.


Here’s some suggestions for taking care of yourself:






And some resources you can call if you need assistance:







Please, take care of yourself, and remember, this is only one day (or only a few). You have at least 350 other days that are all yours. When you can be yourself. When you can surround yourself with those who choose you. Don’t let the assholes win.


505 Responses to “Happy(?) Holidays with Xara X. Xanakas”

  1. I needed to post you this very little remark to finally thank you very much again over the extraordinary information you’ve contributed in this case. It was really open-handed of you to provide easily what exactly most of us would’ve made available for an electronic book to end up making some profit for their own end, notably considering that you might well have tried it in case you considered necessary. The good ideas likewise acted as the easy way to be aware that many people have the same passion just like mine to find out more and more around this matter. I’m sure there are several more pleasant times in the future for individuals who look into your blog post.

  2. Thanks for all of your efforts on this blog. Ellie really loves engaging in investigations and it’s simple to grasp why. A number of us hear all of the lively ways you offer both useful and interesting information by means of the web blog and as well as encourage response from other ones on the area then our own child has been discovering a whole lot. Take pleasure in the rest of the year. You’re performing a really good job.

  3. I would like to express my gratitude for your kindness supporting individuals who have the need for help on this particular concern. Your real commitment to getting the message all over had become incredibly productive and have really enabled workers much like me to achieve their targets. Your new invaluable suggestions indicates a lot a person like me and somewhat more to my office workers. Many thanks; from all of us.

  4. Just because they call it advanced doesn at mean it is.

  5. Some really quality content on this internet site , bookmarked.

Leave a Reply